The other day on a run I passed a smashed bottle cap. It was smooth and flat like a quarter. I thought about how if I was describing it to someone it would sound like I was describing a quarter, but it still wouldn’t pay for my parking at the meter. Later at dinner with my brother I described the encounter with the bottle cap and compared it to internet dating, “You could describe what you were looking for in a person as shiny but…” “But they still wouldn’t fit the bill,” my brother finished knowingly.
Aries, this week it may be necessary to be very specific about describing what you want and noticing how those desires may be different from what others want or from what is perceived as the “right thing” to want or do. Perhaps it is something like this story in reverse, are you describing a quarter, when what you really want or need is a flattened bottle cap?
Recently, I’ve been thinking about how much easier the “hard way” can be. I think this is because the “hard way” often involves some level of control or perceived control. A long time ago I made the screensaver on my phone a picture of little girl pushing a ball up a slight incline. Originally I thought of it as symbol of encouragement, to keep the ball rolling even when the “landscape” physical, or emotional, made it more difficult to accomplish the task. I think at that point in my life I needed this gentle push, but now it feels like a time to readjust the image so I can see the ball rolling downhill without quite so much effort.
Taurus, this week it may be important to reflect on where you may be pushing a ball up an incline or subconsciously choosing the “hard way.” Consider all the pots that boil without your interference and all the other areas of your life which, even when left unattended, continue to grow.
(XII Hanged One Rev/ Hikaru Michi (The Shining Road)- Sonic X)
A few days ago I was walking down a street in Los Angeles which has been tread by many feet, but rarely my own because it is on the opposite side of town from where I live. There was all this stuff I hadn’t seen before and for a moment I felt compelled to snap pictures in rapid succession like a tourist and post them on instagram. Lately however, because of the internet, I’ve had the sneaking suspicion that everything has already been seen. “Even this incidental pile of trash has probably already been posted on Facebook or instagram or maybe it even has its own wikipedia entry,” I thought. Down the street I reconsidered my somewhat pessimistic conclusion from a few paces back. We all look at things from different angles and with different eyes. Excitement, interest, engagement is worth sharing even if you are sharing it again.
Gemini, this week you may find yourself talking back to any voices which have prevented you from unencumbered self-expression or which have tightly belted the sharing of your vision. Set your sights on loose and free.
(XVII Star/ We Don’t Go to God’s House Anymore- Chumbawamba)
I’m writing this from a coffee shop, on my way here I noticed a pipe dripping water on asphalt. Stumbling upon drips in Los Angeles is kind of nightmarish due to the water shortage. My horror was quelled somewhat when I followed the trickle to the ground and noticed a trail of plant life taking advantage of the puddle. A few days prior to this incident I was attempting to water some plants behind my house with a hose that I couldn’t get to attach to the spigot correctly. It kept spraying water out of the weak connection, but I gave up trying to fix the problem when I realized that the leak was also watering a nearby shrub.
Cancer, similar to the scenarios described above, your emotional leaks may be indirectly or inadvertently watering or supporting small ecosystems, but they may also be contributing to a larger problem- like a widespread water shortage. In the long run it would probably be best to fix the leaks and find a more direct application of your emotional energy.
(Priestess of Cups Rev/ Slippin’ and Slidin’- Little Richard)
A poker face and a stiff upper lip and a blank stare and a straight-lace or a straight-face. Fine-how-are-you? Conversations about things that aren’t feelings but sound like feelings like the weather, the drought or the ocean. Masking emotions behind menial tasks. My mother once held her hands up a few inches apart and said jokingly, “I’d say that’s about the emotional range of expression in our family.” In my early twenties when I was confronted with emotions I couldn’t mask or bury I found myself grabbing at what seemed like viable alternative solutions. “Do people tell you all their problems?” I asked a bartender at my neighborhood bar. “No,” she replied flatly. “Can I tell you mine?” “Okay,” she replied reluctantly.
Leo, this week you may find yourself swimming in deep emotional waters. Perhaps the feelings you are navigating are your own or perhaps they are someone else’s, either way consider your boundaries. Consider where over time you may have become too rigid and where and when you may need to redraw a line.
(Shaman of Cups R/ Feeling Sad- Sha-Weez)
In my memory of things that have happened at night there are always pieces missing. I remember sneaking out of my friend’s house at 1 am but the image of the memory is just a hand on a gate or a foot crossing a threshold or my friend’s red shirt under a street light. Night memories are more of a collage, an implied whole based on pieces of information. Besides the obvious cloak of darkness, I think this is also because there were things I was literally trying to hide or hide from. The fears that accompanied the hour also fragmented my visual memory. There was a fear of getting caught and the fear of danger hiding in the shadows, but these potentials only made the experience more desirable.
Virgo this week might be a bit of a mystery. The future is likely cloaked in darkness and only fragments of your current experience may be available to you in retrospect. It might help to imagine you are in a film noir and also to acknowledge that your fears are inextricably tangled with excitement.
(XVIII Moon/ Be Alive Now- Celia Swann)
“Mom! You’re blonde!” I exclaimed recently when face-timing with my mom. “I’m easing in the grey,” she replied casually. My mother has changed her image and style several times over the years. I remember once in the 90s she even had an asymmetrical bob like the red-haired neighbor-character in “Edward Scissorhands.” But when I think of her, when I think of “Mom” with a capital M, I think of the natural frizzy brown bob she had for much of the late 80s and early 90s. The blonde made more sense when I acknowledged her current style and expression.
Libra, this week you may be introducing a new form of expression into your life or at least contemplating the change. Perhaps you are easing into this new form slowly. Don’t be afraid to shock or surprise, especially the people you’ve known the longest. Maybe their image of you is a hold over from the 90s and as such is also in need of an update.
(Ace of Wands L/ Runs in the Family- The Roches)
A few weeks ago I was having a heated discussion with a friend. “You can’t just put on my shoes and imagine that you are seeing things from my perspective,” I said in frustration. “I want you to try and imagine what it would be like to be ME in my shoes.” This is something I’ve thought about a lot recently. I think most people have difficulty truly considering or understanding another’s perspective, “If I were you I would just quit.” The advice is excessively simple because the person has not had to deal with all the things that preceded the difficulty, the anxieties, the emotional anguish, the external and internal pressures. Sometimes it is helpful to be offered outside perspective, other times you want someone to empathize with your situation and that involves something more than just trying on your shoes with or without socks.
Scorpio, the difficulties you encounter this week may have something to do with perspective. Where are you truly able to empathize with another and where is that more difficult to accomplish? Where do you feel that others are not empathizing with you? One possible solution may be to provide more information and/ or ask more questions. With Mercury Retrograde in Gemini, remember that you may have to repeat yourself or ask others to repeat themselves.
(8 of Swords R/ Say- Cat Power)
I could point to several astrological influences as the culprit, but whatever the reason, I always want to be able to answer the question- why. I want to know why every little thing is the way it is and why I feel the way I feel and why someone else feels the way they feel. A long time ago I posted a short story I wrote when I was a kid on Facebook. It was a ghost story and it said something to effect of: “There was a haunted house, but no one believed it was haunted and then a family moved in and they all died because of the ghost, the end.” My friend commented underneath, “Cause and effect.” This pretty much sums up how I look at most things in life: cause and effect. I want to thoroughly investigate the causes and I want to know all the effects.
Sagittarius, this week the Full Moon in your sign may alter the way you've been thinking or feeling. You may feel emotionally liberated from some situation, but you aren’t entirely sure why. Maybe the situation hasn’t changed, but you have. Perhaps you feel ready to move in a new direction, where in the past you felt thwarted by internal or external barriers. Yours is the sign associated with higher truths and the quest for meaning so you may be slightly dissatisfied when the answers to your questions are empty or unavailable. For now just revel in the freedom you feel and don’t worry about all the whys or wherefores.
(O Fool R/ Lithium- The Vaselines)
Recently a friend was making a blueprint of another friend’s apartment on the computer. He was working on some proposed modifications. Glancing over his shoulder I exclaimed, “I had no idea that wall was tilted at an angle!” “That’s really cool that you can see that. Lots of people don’t know how to read blueprint like this. They just don’t know how to translate something 3 dimensional into something flat and vice versa,” he said. His compliment was deeply flattering in large part because it caught me off guard and because I didn’t realize that reading a blueprint required a special talent.
Capricorn, there are likely many things you do without expecting or receiving recognition. Consider that there are many things that come quite naturally to you, languages you speak that others don’t easily understand. This week you may get some of what you are due even if it is just a complement.
(Son of Wands/ Skills- Gang Starr)
A few weeks ago I rescued a hummingbird from my neighbor’s cat. About a week ago a hummingbird started showing up at my kitchen window. I tried to check for missing tail feathers like the one I’d released, but it moved too quickly for me to make out such a small detail. Later I realized that it was attracted to something in the compost bin beneath my window. In the wilds of my imagination the bird was coming back to let me know it was okay, a story which could still hold water, but the visits were also easily explained by much less romantic evidence- just another animal sniffing out the garbage.
Aquarius, this week you may feel slightly pessimistic about what could have been a beautiful tale. Perhaps, with the retrograde, things haven’t been going as smoothly as they would under normal astrological circumstances. Trust that even if your life’s ferris wheel is currently stopped up at the bottom, it will rise again and provide you with a fresh perspective.
(VIII Justice Rev/ Bird In Hand- Lee “Scratch” Perry & the Upsetters)
The other day I was headed to a coffee shop near my house thinking it would be abandoned on a week day. As I approached however, I noticed a slew of people sitting outside. I was standing in front of the walk light across the street but as it turned green I found myself hesitating. I felt anxious about being surrounded so many people even though the whole reason I was headed to the coffee shop in the first place was to get out of my house and be around people. Acknowledging this lifted my spirits and my feet from the pavement.
Pisces, this week you may be opening the door again after a period of reclusion. Even after you step outside you could still have a few more internal doors to open before you feel fully comfortable being out and about. Try to keep your heart light and the doors won’t feel so heavy.
(4 of Discs L/ Cavern- Liquid Liquid)